Pain doesn’t need a sign; Be the Rose

I wasn’t expecting the politeness.

Complete strangers-multiple times a day-held doors open for me, helped me steer my grocery cart around displays, smiled patiently and offered considerate glances. What was different?

I was wearing a huge sling after surgery on my right shoulder.

That first week, the wave of kindness caught me off guard. People were so much more helpful than usual.

I mentioned it to my daughter, and she said she noticed the same thing when she’s out with my eight month old grandson. “Everyone is much nicer,” she said.

And it’s true. The sling changed the way people saw me. It made my injury – and my struggle – visible.

I certainly appreciated the extra patience and thoughtful gestures. But the moment the sling came off, things changed.

People stopped noticing. Their patience vanished. Doors were no longer held open. When one unaware fellow nearly slammed a door on me, I was tempted to put the sling back on!

The thing is, my pain was worse after the sling came off. Just because it was no longer visible didn’t mean it was gone.

We respond to visible wounds, to babies in strollers and arms in slings. But what about the invisible ones?

What about the people walking through life carrying grief, depression, anxiety, exhaustion or fear – the kind of pain you can’t see?

What if we treated everyone as if they were wearing a sling?

My friend Maci once shared a story. She was at a store, struggling with a soda dispenser, when a kind employee came over and helped her.

Maci was touched by her helpfulness, so later that day she bought a rose, returned to the store and gave it to the woman as a thank-you.

Months passed. When Maci finally saw the woman again, she asked, “Do you remember me?”

The woman replied, “I will never forget you. You saved my life.”

Maci says she doesn’t know exactly what that woman meant, but I think we really do know.

She meant that being treated kindly by someone made all the difference in how her day (and life) was going.

Every single person you encounter is carrying something you can’t see. We don’t always get the chance to know what it is. But we always get the chance to choose kindness.

What if we all treated one another as if we were wearing huge slings?

Contact Sharon at tct@pageone-inc.com